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逐词逐句精细批改，不规范表达改进，详细分数分析，500字以上写作指导，全文改进
创建于：2024-09-08 02:50:46
圈里有谁
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高中英语作文精批半年
Lastmonth,myfriendOllieandIdiscoveredaposterintheparkannouncingarecycled-sculpturecontestcalled“TrashtoTreasureDay”.Thegrandprizewasagiftcertificatetoaskateshop—anexcitingprospectforbothofus,sincewewereinneedofnewskateboards.Theposterstatedthatallmaterialswouldbeprovidedon-site,sowedecidedtoteamup.微信公众号IAIEnglishWebrainstormedideasbeforehand.Olliesuggestedarobot,whileIthoughtofatree,butwecouldn’tdeciderightaway.Thatnight,Ilayawaketryingtothinkoftheperfectsculptureidea.WhenIfinallydozedoff,Ihadawilddream.OllieandIwereworkingonasculptureofafire-breathingdragon.Itwassofantastic,weendedupwinningfirstplace.Butjustasthejudgewashandingustheprize,ourdragoncametolifeandswallowedusup!Afterbreakfast,whenItoldOllieaboutthedream,hewascrazyabouttheideaofadragon.ThoughIfeltabituneasyaboutthepartwhereitgobbleusup,Iagreedandspenttherestofthedayresearching.Oncontestday,Ibroughtaperfectdragonpictureasourguide.Theareawasfilledwithrecycledmaterials—cardboard,containers,lids,usedtoys,andtrinkets(小配件)—whileeachworkstationsuppliedscissors,glue,andmarkers.Awomaninahatwelcomedeveryone,encouragingustoworkaloneortogether,withjudgingandcakeatthreeo’clock.OllieandIfoundaspotbutgotofftoaveryslowstart.Wedisagreedonwhichboxestouse,struggledtoattachparts,andcouldn’tmakeoursculpturelookanythinglikemypicture.Afteraverylongtimeofpiecingandpatching,oursculpturestartedtolookthetiniestbitlikeadragon.Tomakeourdragonmorelifelike,werackedourbrains.Ollienotedthatbuttonedlidsmadegoodeyes,butwestillneededamouth.ThenIrememberedabigredzipperonaroundtable—itwasjustright!Ihurriedbacktograbit.(1)续写词数应为150左右；(2)请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。Paragraph1:ButjustasIreachedforthezipper,anotherhandappearedandpickeditup.Paragraph2:IwasprettysureOlliewouldn’tmindanewpartner,andluckilyIwasright.ButjustasIreachedforthezipper,anotherhandappearedandpickeditup.Unfortunately,justatthemomentItriedtoexpressthenecessityofthezipper,themanstaredatmeincalm,saying"Thefirstgotitthefirstgainit"andpassedaway.Afterhesitation,Ichosethecardboardintheleftasalternative.ButasIreturnedtoOllieandpresentedmyobtaining,hesighedandcomplainedthatoursculpturewasnotonlyundelicatebutalsotooslowtoassembleit.SoInegativeamthatIpouredoutmyemotiononOllie,askinghimtochangethepartner.IwasprettysureOlliewouldn'tmindanewpartner,andluckilyIwasright.Hedidn'tsayanythingbutrushedtowardsthenextcorner.Tomysurprise,heturnedparthisfavouritebasketballtrinketstochangethezipper.Astrongsenseofwarmthandenthusiasmoverwhelmingmeashe
Kylie
11-27 07:30 2 评论 0 喜欢
高中英语作文精批半年
假如你是某国际学校的学生李华，你校计划每周开设一次“跨学科课堂（Cross-disciplinaryClass）”，由两位不同学科的老师共同组织。现向全体学生征集关于学科组合的建议，请你给相关负责人Chris写一封邮件，内容包括：(1)提出建议；(2)阐述理由。注意：微信公众号IAIEnglish(1)写作词数应为80左右；(2)可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。DearChris,Yours,LiHua两种模式范文谢谢老师DearChris,KnowingthatthesuggestionsofCross-disciplinaryClass'sisbeingcollected,I'mwritingtooffermysuggestions.ThegroupofEnglishandArtteacherswouldbehelpful.SincewebelievethatbylearningabouttraditionalculturalartifactsinEnglish,studentscannotonlygainadeeperunderstandingofculturebutalsostudyinawaythatbothengagingandhighlyrelevanttothepersonalityofinternationalstudents.Forinstance,theartteacherisabletopresentnumerousdelicatepicturessuchasembroideryhandcrafts,andtheEnglishteacherdescribesitinEnglish,pushingstudentstoguesstherelationships.Itundoubtedlywilllivenuptheclassatmosphere.Thanksforconsideringmyproposal.Lookingforwardtoyourreply!Yours,LiHua
Kylie
11-27 07:27 0 评论 0 喜欢
高中英语作文精批半年
Itwasthelastdaybeforemovingintothenewhouse.Mr.andMrs.Martinwantedtomakeitwarmandlovely,sotheydecidedtodosomedecoratingthemselves.Thatmorning,Mrs.Martinstoodatthedoor,remindingherbusyhusband."Don'tclimbtoohigh,don'tmoveheavyboxes,anddon'tforgettorest,"shesaidagainandagain,beforesheeventuallyheadedouttobuycurtains.Earlier,theirdaughterEmilyhadcalled.Shesaidshewastiedupwithherjobinanothercity,butpromised,"Don'tworry,we'llcelebratetogethersoon."Thecouplemissedher,ofcourse,buttheysmiledateachotherandagreeditwouldbemeaningfultogetthenewhomeready,awarmwelcomeawaitingtheirdaughter'sarrival.Mr.Martinwavedgoodbyetohiswifeandwentbacktohisdecoratingwork,confidentandfullofenergyatfirst.Butsoonthelivingroomturnedintoabattlefield.Boxes,nails,ahammerandscrewdriverslayeverywhere.Paintsplashedontothefloor,andthewalllookedlikeachild'sdrawing.Andseveralphotoframeswerescatteredontheground."Aspider!"Mr.Martinclimbedontoashakystooltochaseitaway—hiswifehatedthosethings—butinsteadheslippedandbrokeaphotoframe."Ouch,myback!"Hegroaned,sweattricklingdownhisforehead.Hebegantowonderwhetherhewasreallyabletodothisjobalone.Thencameasharpsmellfromthekitchen."Ohno,mycake!"Mr.Martindraggedhimselftoopentheoven.Thecake,whichhehadplannedtosurprisehiswife,wasnownothingbutahardblackrock.Hestaredatit,shakinghishead."ShouldIadmitthemess?Orpretendnothinghappened?"hewhispered.Suddenly,thedoorcreakedopen.Mrs.Martinsteppedinsidewiththenewcurtainsinherarms.注意:(1)续写词数应为150左右；微信公众号:英语资料加工厂(2)请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。Paragraph1:Foramoment,Mrs.Martinstoodfrozen.Paragraph2:Withthenewcurtainsfinallyinplace,thedoorbellrang.Foramoment,Mrs.Martinstoodfrozen.Theireyesexchangedinturns,“I'vealreadyremindedyou...”,Mr.Martinrushedforwardandhuggedher,admittinghiserrorstomakenewhouseinamess.Warmedandexhilarated,Mrs.Martininvitedhimtodecoratetogether.Thefirststepwastidyingthefloor,turningthebattlefieldbacktolivingroom.Afterthat,Mrs.MartinledMr.onasafehighttoputthenewcurtainsinsuitableplaces“Up,right...”“yes.Sounbelievableyouarethatcompletingthisdifficulty...”Duringtheseinspiringwordsandeffectivecooperation,Mr.MartinseemedcourageWiththecurtainsfinallyinplace,thedoorbellrang.AnoverwhelmingsurprisetouchedthemwhentheycaughtsightofEmily'sappearance.“Ohmydear,Whyyoubringastrawberrycakeback”Mr.Martinjoked.“BecauseI'msureyouwouldmessedthehouse~I'mkidding,Ijustwanttocheeryouup.”MrandMrs.MartinledEmilytovisithernewdecoratedroomandreviewedthephotostheytookfromherchildhood.SocozywasitthatItnotonlydeepenedthefamily'sconnectionbutalso
Kylie
11-27 07:25 1 评论 0 喜欢
高中英语作文精批半年
假定你是李华，上周在接待国际交换生的过程中，因为文化差异，发生了一个小尴尬。请写一封电子邮件给英国笔友Jenny,内容包括:微信公众号:英语资料加工厂(1)事情经过；(2)所获启示。注意:(1)写作词数应为80左右；(2)请按如下格式在答题纸的相应位置作答。DearJenny,I'dliketosharewithyouasmallawkwardmomentlastweek.老师两种模式范文谢谢DearJenny,I'dliketosharewithyouasmallawkwardmomentlastweek.Sincetheculturedifferencebetweenus,Imisunderstoodaninternationalexchangestudent'sopinion.Designedtogreettheseexchangestudentsandpromotecultureexchange,weheldCultureExhibitionandgaveoutticketstothem.However,whenmyfriendLilygainedtheticketafterIexplainedtheeventsjustlikeembroidery,shemerelysaidthanks.Inmyopinion,"thanks"meansrefusinginakindwaysoIreturnedbacktheticket.Butsheexplainedshe'sinpleasure.That'stooembarrassing!Fortunately,Igainedapointthatweshouldtakemovementsafterclearlyunderstandsthewholething.Ifnot,wecanquestion.I'mwonderingwhat'syourviews,lookingforwardtoyourreply!Yours,LiHua
Kylie
11-27 07:23 0 评论 0 喜欢
高中英语作文精批半年
第二段写了两个主题假定你是李华，你校将为国际部学生组织一日研学活动，主题为“传统与现代”，请给负责人Mr.Smith写一封邮件，内容包括：1.活动方案2.阐述理由DearSmith,Havingknownstudyresearchapproachesofinternationalstudentsarerequired,I'dliketopresentmyapproach.①.TheactivitywillbeheldatCitycenternextFriday,featuring"TraditionAndModern".StudentswillbeledintoCulturalSportsMuseumtolearnitsdevelopmentthroughVR.Afterthat,theycouldgotonearbylaketoexperienceDragonBoatRacing,apopularandancientwatersportwhichissimilartoCanoeingfromwesterncountryforitsteamworkspirits.Thisapproachcannotonlydeepenstudents'understandingoftraditionalculturebyancreativemodernwaybutalsopromotephysicalfitnessandcooperateability.Ihopemyinitiativewouldbeadopted,lookingforwardtoyourresponse.Yours,LiHua②.TheactivitywillbeheldinCityMuseumnextFriday,featuring"TraditionAndModern".Initsexhibition,apartfromthosenumerousdelicateantiques,elaboratehandicrafts,aspecialperformanceshowwillbepresented,showcasingauthentichistoricalrelicsthroughinnovativeVRtechniques.Notonlycanthisinitiativedeepenstudents'understandingoftraditionalChineseculturebutalsoexperiencemodernChina'shighqualitydevelopment.
Kylie
11-26 12:13 1 评论 0 喜欢
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